When you can't fall back alseep

I hate it when you wake up in the middle of the night or 2 hours before your alarm goes off (this is what happen to me today) and you can't fall back to sleep no matter how you toss and turn to try.  I usually use that time to work on my blogs or read the book I am currently trying to read- A Fistful of Charms (The Hollows, Book 4).

However, sometimes it happens for a reason- you brain won't turn off because you keep thinking of something. I remember a time a few years back when my grandmother passed (father's mother). I was expected to speak at the service and I was racking my brain to try to think about what to write with no luck- so I told myself to sleep on it.  However, I found myself woken up in the middle of the night when it came to me what I wanted to say.  This is what I said...

My Grandmother by Pam Fraser

My grandmother is a remarkable woman.

She's a wonderful combination of

warmth and kindness, laughter and love.

She overlooks my faults, encourages my dreams,

and praises my every success.

My grandmother has the wisdom of a teacher,

the sincerity of a true friend, and the

tenderness of a mother.

She's someone I admire, respect and

Love very much.

My grandmother will always have a cherished

place in our memories and in my heart.

She's someone for whom I want every happiness

in return for the joy she always brings.

My grandmother is all the dear and precious

in my life...

Which brings me to My Grandmother’s Smile

Over the last few nights I have been laying there trying to think of my fondest memory of Grandmom.  Pictures of my past and childhood ran through my mind not know where to stop- the beach, the green striped sofa, the back yard, a cardinal- but I just didn’t know what my fondest memory was.  So there I was sound asleep on Sunday morning and I woke up around 4:30 am and it hit me- Her smile!  Every picture and memory that ran through my mind she had a smile.

Some of the biggest smiles that stick out for me are during some of my happiest moments in my life.  I can picture now as though it was just today- July 12, 2003- my wedding day.  We are at the reception and I walk out into the lobby area and see my grandparents sitting here holding a martini glass of those cheddar cheese gold fish- in fact I even have a picture of this- there they are sitting with their shoulders cuddling and talking and across her face is this big smile.  Another one that comes to mind is when I was younger-  now it happened over the course of many times- but goosh she loved to give us treats- those lemon squares and Ice cream- there was always ice cream in the ice chest.  Every time she scooped a cone up or sliced a lemon square she had a smile across our face as she watched me eat it and my nick name “Messy Jessi” came true.

So if I could tell her one last thing it would be- You made us all happy when you smiled!

My Grandparents on my wedding day

What children need most are the essentials that grandparents provide in abundance.  They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humor, comfort, lessons in life.  And, most importantly, cookies.  ~Rudolph Giuliani